skip to main |
skip to sidebar
The Mighty Muggs will rule the world! Hasbro keeps coming up with new Mighty Muggs all the time, and this batch is just as cute as the one before. Look for chunky versions of Star Wars favorites Obi-Wan Kenobi, Luke Skywalker, C-3PO and Mace Windu. If Star Wars is not your thing, you freak, then you might enjoy collecting some of their Marvel line of Muggs, including Spider-Man, Venom, Iron Man and Wolverine. They only cost about $9.99 so don’t be a cheap bastard and buy them! More Mighty Muggs coming soon.
Starring:
Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, James Franco, Thomas Haden Church, Topher Grace, Bryce Dallas Howard, Rosemary Harris, Bruce Campbell
Director:
Sam Raimi (Evil Dead, Darkman)
MPAA Rating:
PG-13 for sequences of intense action violence.
Release Date:
May 2007
Synopsis:
While Spider-Man’s superpowers are altered by an alien organism, his alter ego, Peter Parker, deals with new villains Sandman, New Goblin and Venom, while also getting caught up in a love triangle.
My Two Cents:
Not every franchise that makes its way to theaters gets more than two movies, and even if they do they’re not always good. Spider-Man is considered by many to be the best comic book superhero series of films ever, topping Batman, Superman and the X-Men, but even though Spider-Man 3 was directed by the same director as the first two, this one is definitely the weakest of the trilogy.
The first two films were so good my expectations for the third were probably too high, but this was not why it’s the weakest. Along the way we’ve been introduced to Peter Parker, Mary Jane, Aunt May, Harry Osborn, Norman Osborn and Otto Octavius. For an action movie there has been plenty of character development, making you actually care about these people and their relationships with one another. So the problem with part 3 is that they keep trying to develop all those characters while adding new ones like Flint Marko, Gwen Stacy, and Eddie Brock, all who deserve equal screen time. In Spider-Man there was only one villain, the Green Goblin, and in Spider-Man 2 there was also one villain, Doctor Octopus. The whole movies were devoted to them, giving the writers plenty of time to tell a detailed back story and the purpose each villain had for turning bad. In Spider-Man 3 you have three new villains, count them, three! So in two hours you have to share time for, hold on tight… Peter Parker, Spider-Man, Mary Jane, Harry Osborn, New Goblin, Aunt May, Gwen Stacy, Flint Marko, Sandman, Eddie Brock, and Venom. That’s over 10 characters, not to mention supporting characters like J.J. Jameson, Uncle Ben, Dr. Connors, Captain Stacy, Bruce Campbell and a few others. Too many fucking people.
The new villains are awesome. Sandman’s effects are insane, and his story is the most touching. He’s not out to kill the citizens of New York for pleasure, he only wants to save his daughter and must steal to pay for her operation. New Goblin may not be a true super villain since he seems only interested in killing Spider-Man instead of taking over the world, but he’s a villain nonetheless. The alien symbiote is the biggest threat, adhering to Peter Parker and slowly eating away his mind and then fusing with Eddie Brock to form the entity known as Venom. I don’t have anything bad to say about the villains, but I wish they had saved Venom for a fourth movie or perhaps exclude Sandman from the third, as Venom is more interesting.
M.J. and Peter’s romance has been hitting some bumps and things get extra shitty when Peter dons the black-suit. His personality changes from a nerd to an angry emo. Remember when Peter loses his abilities in Spider-Man 2 and decides to be Spider-Man no more? That “Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head” bit seems like an Oscar-worthy scene from The Godfather compared to Spider-Man 3’s disturbing emo jazz dance scene. I fucking hate jazz! It’s painful to watch, but at least it gives Peter a different look and feel from his regular nerdy self.
The action scenes are on par with what we’ve seen in previous films. Sandman is involved in three major battles, but sadly Venom is only in one. If you count black-suit Spider-Man as Venom then he’s in two fights, but that would be cheating yourself. This is why Venom needed a movie for himself. But anyway, the action is fun, and the special effects are really good. The sound and music is also fantastic, even if Danny Elfman didn’t score it. Christopher Young (Hellraiser, The Grudge) used the original Elfman Spider-Man theme and added new themes for Sandman and Venom, both which are pretty sweet. However, there was a great fight scene between emo Parker and Harry that had fucking jazz playing in the background. Did I mention I hate jazz?
Spider-Man 3 was the highest grossing film of 2007, beating other high-profile sequels like Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End and Shrek the Third, as well as Transformers. There’s no doubt Sam Raimi cares a whole lot about the characters and story and tried his best not to disappoint the hardcore fans and also entertain casual fans. It’s action-packed, funny and still charming after all these years. Too many characters messed things up a bit and almost left Venom out in the cold, but what’s here is enough to entertain and excite. If you’ve watched and enjoyed the first two films there’s no reason not to pick this one up.
Score:
Starring:
Ioan Gruffudd, Jessica Alba, Chris Evans, Michael Chiklis, Julian McMahon, Andre Braugher, Laurence Fishburne
Director:
Tim Story (Barbershop, Taxi)
MPAA Rating:
PG for sequences of action violence, some mild language and innuendo.
Release Date:
June 2007
Synopsis:
The Fantastic Four battle the Silver Surfer, a strange alien being who travels the Earth preparing it for total destruction at the hands of his master.
My Two Cents (Spoilers):
Comic book movies have always been popular, and almost every superhero out there has his own movie, like Daredevil, Hellboy and Ghost Rider. It was only a matter of time before someone came up with a Silver Surfer movie, but since his first appearance was in the Fantastic Four comics, they couldn’t make him the main star. That’s probably why he doesn’t truly shine in Rise of the Silver Surfer, because he’s not the main dish.
Most Marvel fans know that the Silver Surfer travels the universe looking for yummy planets for his master, Galactus, to devour. That’s all he does. The Surfer visits a planet and if it seems worthy then Galactus absorbs all its energy, and the cycle repeats. Galactus is a being of god-like powers, and the Silver Surfer only works for him in exchange of him sparing his home world. What you must understand is that Galactus is a super being of immeasurable power that no one can stop.
Back on Earth, the Fantastic Four are trying to get used to the fame and fortune of being, well, fantastic. They’ve all perfected their powers and seem to be doing fine, saving kittens stuck on trees and helping old ladies cross the street. Now out of nowhere a flying silver man comes surfing from space and starts wrecking havoc on Earth with alien technology. Oceans freeze, snow falls on deserts, and Jessica Alba’s eyes turn the fakest shade of blue. The FF (Fantastic Four… duh) don’t know it, but Galactus is coming to Earth in 8 days. Holy shit! Just think about this for a moment. You’re watching a movie where Galactus is coming to eat our world. Isn’t that the best possible way to go? Pure awesomeness!
Everything I’ve said, or wrote, so far sounds like a sweet movie plot, and it is, but the execution is all wrong. We’ve barely seen the FF do anything fantastic because in the first film they were just learning how to use their abilities. They faced and defeated Dr. Doom, but that’s it. What else have they done? We’ve barely seen the FF do anything and now they’re going to stop an invincible alien invader? It’s ridiculous.
Thanks to Reed Richard’s intelligence he creates a device that emits a pulse capable of detaching the Silver Surfer from his board, thus rendering him powerless. For no reason at all Dr. Doom has been freed from his prison in Latveria and has joined the FF in their quest to stop the Surfer. What the hell? Didn’t Doom try to kill everyone in the first film? Right… Anyway, when the Surfer is captured, Dr. Doom takes his board and goes on a killing spree. Actually, that’s what I would have liked to see, but since this is a PG film he only destroys the Great Wall of China and some mountains. Stupid family movie stuff. I admit the few scenes of Dr. Doom surfing and blowing stuff up are my favorite because the effects are pretty sweet.
When the FF learn of Galactus’ existence they free Silver Surfer and go in search of Dr. Doom. But Sue is killed, and there’s only one person who can stop Doom now. No, not the Surfer, but the Human Torch. Why? Because apparently he is the main character of this movie. Forget Reed’s intelligence or the alien surfer from beyond, no, it’s Johnny who gets the most screen time here. He was the first one to come in contact with the Silver Surfer and for whatever reason he gains the ability to absorb the powers of his friends. So, when Doom goes apeshit in China, Johnny absorbs everyone’s powers and defeats Dr. Doom by himself. That’s bullshit, I know.
So now the Silver Surfer regains his board and decides to confront Galactus. Finally, this is what I’ve been waiting for the whole time, to see Galactus in all his majesty. But wait, what the fuck is this? When Silver Surfer exits the Earth’s atmosphere he confronts a giant, shapeless fart cloud. Oh my God… is that supposed to be Galactus? Fuck you Tim Story! Fuck you 20th Century Fox! Goddamit. Why waste the ONLY chance to have Galactus in a movie by turning him into space manure? Think of how cool this could have been. Having his massive shadow slowly cover the world. His gigantic helmet looming over the horizon. His deep, angry voice causing earthquakes. Oh man… fuck this shit.
Overall the film’s not bad and might entertain you. Weta Workshop, the team responsible for The Lord of The Rings special effects, created a very cool-looking Surfer. Everyone’s powers look fine, except Reed Richard’s, which look too cartoony and fake. Seeing Dr. Doom again was kind of nice, but nothing we hadn’t seen before. Johnny provides most of the humor, but don’t expect too much as this is a PG-rated film. Laurence Fishburne is the voice of the Silver Surfer, and as cool as it is I couldn’t stop thinking about Morpheus.
It’s just too bad the mighty Galactus was reduced to feces, even though it is barely hinted that behind the poop cloud lies the Galactus we all know and love, but why tease us like that? Also, the Silver Surfer doesn’t do much here and comes off as a very cold and heartless guy. They try to change this near the end but it didn’t work for me, as the true reason for his coldness is that Galactus has manipulated his very soul so he doesn’t feel guilt for bringing death to billions of life forms around the universe. This should have been explained in the movie. I don’t think we need a third Fantastic Four movie, but if there is one they better not fuck it up again. Tone down the kiddy humor and bring up the chaos and violence that superhero comics are known for.
Score:
