Owned!

King Dedede is about to suck the big one by landing inside the mouth of a giant Bulborb. Penguins do seem tastier than Pikmin.

Movie Review: 28 Weeks Later

Starring:
Robert Carlyle, Catherine McCormack, Imogen Poots, Mackintosh Muggleton, Rose Byrne, Jeremy Renner, Harold Perrineau

Director:
Juan Carlos Fresnadillo

MPAA Rating:
R for strong violence and gore, language and some sexuality/nudity.

Release Date:
May 2007

Synopsis:
The inhabitants of the British Isles appear to have lost their battle against the onslaught of disease, as the deadly rage virus has killed every citizen there. Six months later, a group of Americans dare to set foot on the isles, convinced the danger has come and gone. But it soon becomes clear that the fight is far from over.

My Two Cents:
28 Days Later was a frightening and very disturbing horror movie were people infected with a rage virus turned into mindless zombies craving only fresh blood. These zombies were scary as hell because they ran as fast or even faster than normal people, and could instantly infect you just by biting or simply drooling on you. Even if it had a sort of happy ending, along comes a sequel, 28 Weeks Later, and it’s just as hellish as the first.

The second time around you already know how these raging zombies behave, so the director had to turn up the gore and violence in order to make an impact on the viewers. If ultra violence is your thing you’ll love a certain scene involving around 50 zombies and a helicopter.



For two hours you’ll be biting your nails, suffering what the few survivors go through trying to stay alive. The visual and DTS sound effects, along with the music, will suck you in and never let go. The Blu-ray versions suffers from horrible grain, so you might want to consider watching the standard definition DVD. Yeah, it’s that distracting.

The first movie was great, but the pacing was suddenly slowed down when the survivors enter a military complex and the movie started sucking after that. The sequel maintains the same level of excitement and horror throughout, and even though parts of the plot make little to no sense, like a woman who doesn’t get infected because she has eyes of two different colors and a “boss” zombie that only seems interested in eating his own children, it’s a better movie overall. Remember that there are a lot of gruesome and disturbing images, so try not to eat pizza or lasagna before watching 28 Weeks Later.

Score:

Cool Collectibles: MGS4 Solid Snake and Raiden

Konami's Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots is not even out yet and Medicom Toy Corporation already made 12 inch tall, fully articulated collectible figures of two of the main characters, Solid Snake and Raiden. They should be released in the second quarter of 2008 for about $175.



This Solid Snake figure can kick all your other figures’ asses with both hands tied behind his back and they won’t even know he was there. He comes with a rifle and a handgun, but no word yet on stealth camouflage.




The Raiden from MGS4 looks 50% less gay than the one from MGS2, and 100% creepier. His face shield protector can be pulled up or down and he comes with a bunch of swords.

Docking Bay 94 Update

Six new designs have been added to my Docking Bay 94 T-shirt shop. Click on the links to view different T-shirt styles.

1. It is your destiny. – Darth Vader (Star Wars: Episode V)
2. Dear humanity: We regret being alien bastards. - Sergeant Johnson (Halo 2)
3. Gimme some sugar, baby! – Ash (Army of Darkness)
4. Seeing you in action is a joke. – Blanka (Street Fighter II)
5. I’m not even supposed to be here today! – Dante Hicks (Clerks)
6. The black wind howls. – Janus (Chrono Trigger)

Movie Review: The Guardian

Starring:
Kevin Costner, Ashton Kutcher, Sela Ward, Clancy Brown, Melissa Sagemiller, Neal McDonough

Director:
Andrew Davis (Above the Law, The Fugitive)

MPAA Rating:
PG-13 for intense sequences of action/peril, brief strong language and some sensuality.

Release Date:
September 2006

Synopsis:
Appointed to teach at an elite Coast Guard school, legendary rescue swimmer Ben Randall is compelled to skillfully train and inspire cocky upstart Jake Fischer. Applying unorthodox coaching methods, Ben helps the young hotshot build his strength and character.

My Two Cents:
Becoming a Coast Guard rescue swimmer is tough as hell, but it grants the rescuer the satisfaction of saving someone’s life. The movie portrays the whole process it takes to become a hero.

Ben Randall (Kevin Costner) has become a legend among rescuers with a record for saving over 300 lives, and only agrees to become a teacher for new volunteers because of a terrible incident where three of his teammates died. He blames himself for what happened even when it was completely out of his control. This has turned him into a bit of an ogre as an instructor, because he believes only the very best should graduate from the academy.

One of the students is Jake Fischer (Ashton Kutcher), a swimming champion with as much talent as Randall, but nothing of his wisdom or experience. Randall pushes him to the limit, making Fischer as good as he can be.



The movie is among the most predictable ones I’ve seen, but it has powerful visuals and very human characters. Both Costner and Kutcher to a fine job of a sort of father and son, master and apprentice relationship that makes you care and cheer for them. The rescues they’re involved in are both amazing and frightening. You certainly come out appreciating the Coast Guard rescue swimmers’ job a whole lot more.

The film runs a little long even with all the fun training scenes and rescues. They could have edited about 15 to 20 minutes. Still, it’s a captivating and powerful drama that will make you admire the brave men and women that put their lives on the line to save yours.

Score:

Cosplay: Resident Evil

Dressing up as soldiers doesn’t sound too hard, but having a face that looks like the character you’re cosplaying as is tough. This guy dressed as Chris Redfield looks pretty good in costume and his face looks close enough to Chris’ GameCube remake. The chick dressed like Jill Valentine also looks like the remake version, especially her eyes. Her costume could have been better but overall it’s pretty good.




When I saw Ada Wong for the first time in Resident Evil 2 I thought she was Asian, but she looks a lot less Asian in part 4. This Ada look-alike even made the butterfly pattern on her red dress for a very sexy imitation of the original. The dude playing Leon S. Kennedy is definitely the coolest-looking male Resident Evil cosplayer I’ve seen so far. He really does look like him.

Movie Review: Man on Fire

Starring:
Denzel Washington, Dakota Fanning, Marc Anthony, Christopher Walken, Radha Mitchell, Mickey Rourke

Director:
Tony Scott (Top Gun, Enemy of the State)

MPAA Rating:
R for language and strong violence.

Release Date:
April 2004

Synopsis:
John Creasy is a former federal agent whose outlook on life is anything but sunny. While in Mexico City, he halfheartedly takes a job protecting the child of a couple whose lives have been threatened. The little girl begins to grow on Creasy, and the two form a bond that revives his trampled soul. But when she's kidnapped, Creasy's fury is unstoppable as he desperately seeks revenge on her kidnappers.

My Two Cents:
John Creasy (Denzel Washington) is sent to a rich Mexican household to serve as a bodyguard to the family’s nine-year old daughter because Mexico City’s kidnapping rate has gone through the roof. About 24 people are kidnapped every day, even in plain sunlight. You know that at some point Pita (Dakota Fanning) will get kidnapped and Creasy will have to save her. It takes so long for this to happen that you kind of forget about it and can completely enjoy the chemistry between the bodyguard and the girl. Both Washington and Fanning are great actors and their performances are a treat to watch.

When the girl is finally kidnapped the movie goes from drama to action, but not exactly the action you might be expecting. I don’t want to give too much away, but if you saw The Crow or The Punisher you’ll have a pretty good idea of what kind of action I’m talking about. Although I didn’t mind too much, it does take away part of the believability of Denzel’s character. A one man army fighting an entire gang of kidnappers and corrupt police in a foreign country is just silly.



Christopher Walken plays Creasy’s old friend who gets him the bodyguard job and later provides the firepower needed to stop the kidnappers. Puerto Rican salsa sensation Marc Anthony, better known as that skinny guy who married J-Lo, plays Pita’s father and Silent Hill’s Radha Mitchell plays her mother.

The movie’s art style is nice, and the acting is as good as you’d expect from Washington, Fanning and Walken. Although never boring, not even in the long time it takes for Creasy to fall for Pita’s charm, the movie would have benefited from a bit more editing, like 20 minutes or so. After Creasy takes take of a crapload of kidnappers and you think the movie will end, even more kidnappers start showing up and the movie goes on for another 45 minutes. It’s a bit tiring. But don’t let this put you off. If revenge films are to your liking or you just want to see Denzel Washing ton kicking ass right to the bittersweet ending then go right ahead and watch Man on Fire. You might end up cancelling your vacation to Mexico, though.

Score:

Weekend Box Office Report: Jan 11-13

Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman still have what it takes to drive crowds to theaters. The Bucket List finally knocked National Treasure: Book of Secrets from the #1 spot, sending it tumbling down to #4. Juno, the little movie that could, is standing stronger than ever at #3, and Ice Cube’s First Sunday took the #2 spot.

1. The Bucket List
This week: $19,540,000

Total: $20,964,000

2. First Sunday
This week: $19,000,000
Total: $19,000,000

3. Juno
This week: $14,000,000
Total: $71,250,000

4. National Treasure: Book of Secrets
This week: $11,482,000 - Total: $187,295,000

5. Alvin and the Chipmunks
This week: $9,100,000 - Total: $187,740,000

6. I Am Legend
This week: $8,130,000 - Total: $240,234,000

7. One Missed Call
This week: $6,130,000 - Total: $20,642,000

8. P.S. I Love You
This week: $5,005,000 - Total: $47,008,000

9. The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything: A VeggieTales Movie
This week: $4,419,000 - Total: $4,419,000

10. Atonement
This week: $4,300,000 - Total: $25,208,000

Achievement Unlocked

Harry Potter pulls off an Anakin Skywalker by turning to the dark side of the Force and becoming a Dark Lord of the Sith. Nooooooooooooo!

Owned!

Who would win in a fight between a Predalien and a Predator? Apparentely, neither. Here they finish the battle with a messy double KO.

Movie Review: Scary Movie 4

Starring:
Anna Faris, Craig Bierko, Regina Hall, Bill Pullman, Leslie Nielsen, Anthony Anderson, Carmen Electra, Chris Elliott, Shaquille O’Neil, Phil McGraw

Director:
David Zucker (Airplane, Top Secret)

MPAA Rating:
PG-13 for crude and sexual humor throughout, some comic violence and language.

Release Date:
April 2006

My Two Cents:
Coming up just a little short of being the funniest Scary Movie, part 4 delivers the laughs and insanity expected of the series. The world has been invaded by aliens and only by solving the murder of a little Japanese boy can peace be restored. That doesn’t make any sense, and that’s how I like it.

Anna Faris returns to play Cindy Campbell, the lovable but dumb blonde who gets herself in all kinds of trouble. She’s joined by Regina Hall who once again plays Cindy’s fried Brenda Meeks, and series newcomer Craig Bierko, who basically plays Tom Cruise. Most of the movie revolves around making fun of War of the World, but they also ridicule other movies like Saw, Fahrenheit 9/11, The Village, Brokeback Mountain, The Grudge, Million Dollar Baby and Hustle & Flow.



The special effects of the tripods are surprisingly good, as are all the sets that mimic the movies they spoof. The bathroom from Saw looks identical, as well as the Japanese house from The Grudge. Great stuff.

It doesn’t matter if you didn’t like the previous movies of the series, or haven’t watched them yet because you can enjoy Scary Movie 4 on its own. Just make sure to watch at least some of the movies being spoofed to better appreciate the comedy and over-acting.

Score:

Yoda and Darth Vader Invade Soul Calibur IV

Namco Bandai and Lucas Arts have shocked the video game world today with the announcement that Star Wars' Master Yoda and Darth Vader will be joining the cast of Soul Calibur IV. This would normally seem bizarre, but Soul Calibur II included Link, Spawn and Heihachi as playable characters, so anything goes these days. Although I can't say I'm completely surprised, I can say, however, that I didn't see this coming.

Unfortunately we won't be able to pit the light side of the Force against the dark side because each character will be exclusive to one particular console. The Xbox 360 gets the little green Jedi Master and the PlayStation 3 gets the Dark Lord of the Sith. It's both awesome and sucks space balls at the same time. Namco sure knows how to make hardcore gamers spend extra money on their games.





Be sure to head over to http://www.soulcalibur.com/ to watch the high resolution trailer directly from the CES '08 event.

Character Profile: Mike Haggar

After living his life as a wrestling street fighter, Mike Haggar turned to politics and won the election to become mayor of Metro City. He swore to rid the city of the terrible crime wave caused by the Mad Gear gang. This made Belger, leader of Mad Gear, royally pissed and arranged for Haggar’s daughter, Jessica, to be kidnapped. Rather than succumbing to Mad Gear’s threats, Haggar enlisted Jessica’s boyfriend, Cody, and his friend Guy to go down to Metro City’s meanest streets and beat the shit out of every single Mad Gear member.

Wasn’t the above paragraph fun? That’s the plot of 1989’s Final Fight, the game where the world was introduced to Haggar. I remember playing it for the first time at the arcade. Cody and Guy looked cool, but Haggar was a fucking shirtless pile-driving mayor with work pants and a huge belt over one shoulder. I had never seen an awesomer game character before. Is that belt supposed to keep his pants from dropping to the floor? Who cares? He’s Haggar, and her can wear whatever the hell he wants.

He was the slowest, but also the strongest. He singlehandedly made the pile-drive famous. Russian bear-wrestler Zangief made the pile-driver even cooler by giving it a spin two years later, and that’s why these two monsters of wrestling despise each other.

Capcom knew they had created an unstoppable muscle machine and decided to include Haggar as a playable character in 1993’s Saturday Night Slam Masters and its sequel, Ring of Destruction, a year later. He also made appearances in the Super Nintendo exclusives Final Fight 2 and 3, rejoining forces with Guy and recruiting help from newcomers Maki, Dean and Carlos. In 1999 Capcom USA released the god-awful Final Fight Revenge, a 3D fighting game with some of the worst polygon models ever. Haggar was a playable character but not even his awesomeness could save this steaming pile of rhinoceros anal discharge. Haggar had a cameo in 2006’s Final Fight Streetwise, teaching Cody’s younger brother, Kyle, some grappling moves. He ran a crummy gym and was no longer the mayor of Metro City. People barely remember him, if they remember him at all. That’s so sad. Why would Capcom do this to poor Haggar? Oh by the way, Final Fight Streetwise sucks the big one.

After beat’em ups died down and Final Fight’s future seemed bleak, a few characters from the series started appearing in Street Fighter Alpha. First there was Guy and Sodom, then Rolento, then Cody. Even Hugo Andore appeared in Street Fighter III, but still no Haggar. What the fuck, Capcom? Namco included Haggar in Namco X Capcom, but that game was never released outside Japan. Again, what the fuck?

You can see I’m passionate about Haggar and can only hope Capcom brings him back soon. If there’s ever a Marvel vs. Capcom 3 every character on Capcom’s side should be Haggar. Raise your hand if you want to be pile-drived by Haggar. *raises hand*

Wii Virtual Console Review: Top Hunter: Roddy & Cathy

Developer: SNK
Publisher: SNK
Console: Neo-Geo
Release Date: June 1994

Set many years in the future, when mankind has colonized the far reaches of space, an evil group of space pirates known as the Klaptons are wrecking havoc through the galaxy. Authorities can’t handle them, so they placed huge bounties on their heads in the hopes that some brave hero will claim them and restore peace to the universe. Bounty hunters Roddy and Cathy answer the call and promise to bring down the space pirates for good.

Although the game looks like a Metal Slug clone at first, the game mechanics are not about shooting stuff. You actually fight hand-to-hand close quarters combat, picking up enemies, stones, crates, etc. and tossing them around. Roddy and Cathy have retractable arms that stretch pretty far to grab baddies or items lying around. By using Street Fighter-like controller motions you can throw fireballs and perform rising punches and kicks. Both playable characters have the exact same moves, so it makes no different which one you choose. Two players can play the game simultaneously.

Every stage has two layers where you can walk on; one on the foreground and one in the background. With the press of a button your character will jump-kick to the next layer, just like in Fatal Fury. This feature is cool at first but because your characters don’t scale in size when they jump to the background it’s hard to see in which layer the bad guys and items are. You’ll occasionally find a gun or a bomb to use as weapons, and even commandeer a big bi-pedal armored walker, similar to the one in Mega Man X.



The game is divided in four main worlds, each with two sections and a boss in each. There are fire, ice, forest and wind themed levels. The enemies vary from state to stage, but they behave the same. Some bosses fight you on foot, but most operate huge machines. After you beat all four worlds you’ll travel to the Klaptons’ spaceship for one last round of ass-kicking.

The level of detail in the graphics is awesome. Every background has plenty of stuff going on, with cascades, lava rivers, trees shaking in the wind, etc. The characters also look pretty nice, but unfortunately don’t animate that well. If it had better animation you could easily mistake this for Metal Slug.

I wasn’t too impressed with the audio, but it’s not bad. Standard sound effects of gunshots, punches and creature roars. The music is forgettable but you’ll be too busy fighting bad guys and trying to survive to care.



While decent, Top Hunter doesn’t provide enough variety to be a truly fun game. After a few minutes of picking stuff up and tossing it around you’ll wish there was more depth and replay value. Playing with a friend helps, but it also makes things more confusing with everything that’s going on. Infinite continues pretty much ruin the fun of beating each tough boss, so you’ll just breeze through the levels not caring to pick up items or power-ups. Why bother, right? Top Hunter worked better as a quarter-muncher at the arcade than on a home console because of this.

Score:

Movie Review: The Hot Chick

Starring:
Rob Schneider, Anna Faris, Rachel McAdams, Matthew Lawrence, Melora Hardin, Alexandra Holden, Tia Mowry

Director:
Philip G. Atwell (The Animal)

MPAA Rating:
PG-13 for crude sexual humor, language and drug references.

Release Date:
December 2002

Synopsis:
Cheerleader Jessica Spencer is as shallow and spiteful as she is pretty and popular. Her cruel nature gets her in trouble when a curse traps her in the body of a 30-year-old man. Humbled, confused and in constant need of a shave, Jessica frantically tries to figure out how to switch back in time for the prom and the big cheerleading competition.

My Two Cents:
Even though this movie was annihilated by critics I decided to give it a chance and came out pleasantly surprised. Some people don’t consider comedians to be real actors, but I think it’s tougher to be funny than dramatic. Not anyone can go from playing a man, to playing a woman trapped in a man’s body. Besides playing a teenage girl, Rob Schneider also plays a thief, a school janitor and a Mexican immigrant by the name of Taquito. All are very funny, but Taquito takes the cake.

The movie is not all about bizarre sexual jokes and fart jokes. There are actually a few nice messages of true friendship, being proud of your heritage, improving your self esteem and overcoming marital hardships.



Anna Faris plays Rob’s, or should I say Jessica’s best friend, April. She looks cuter than ever here and is just as funny as in the Scary Movie, um, movies. Actually, every character is funny and charming in their own way. Adam Sandler’s cameo as a pot-head store employee is just as funny as it sounds.

Funny dialog and very awkward situations highlight Schneider’s comedic timing. If you enjoy silly, goofy, and juvenile comedies then you might find yourself laughing out loud with The Hot Chick.

Score:

Weekend Box Office Report: Jan 4-6

For the third consecutive week Disney's National Treasure: Book of Secrets has been the top movie at the box office. It's well on its way to breaking the $200 million mark already broken by Will Smith's I Am Legend. The little independent film Juno has generated positive reviews and could become Fox Searchlight's biggest hit of all time.

1. National Treasure: Book of Secrets
This week: $20,225,000
Total: $171,033,000

2. I Am Legend
This week: $16,300,000
Total: $228,638,000

3. Juno
This week: $16,225,000
Total: $52,032,000

4. Alvin and the Chipmunks
This week: $16,000,000 - Total: $176,738,000

5. One Missed Call
This week: $13,525,000 - Total: $13,525,000

6. Charlie Wilson’s War
This week: $8,184,000 - Total: $52,630,000

7. P.S. I Love You
This week: $8,010,000 - Total: $39,378,000

8. The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep
This week: $6,300,000 - Total: $30,893,000

9. Sweeny Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
This week: $5,400,000 - Total: $38,472,000

10. Atonement
This week: $5,124,000 - Total: $19,216,000

Game Commercials: Street Fighter II

My most cherished video game series of all time got zero respect from Capcom USA and everyone involved in the making of this commercial. It’s ugly, bizarre, and disturbing. When I played Street Fighter II: The World Warrior I never thought of old black and white movies and dinosaurs. What the hell, man?





Now this is more like it. This was the first time I saw live-action Street Fighter characters, and they looked awesome! That M. Bison guy is wicked cool, maybe because he reminds me of Terminator 2’s Robert Patrick. Guile’s hair will never look good on a real human being, but Chun Li looks fantastic. These two short commercials were included in a GamePro/Capcom promotional video for Street Fighter II Special Champion Edition, and are better than the whole Van Damme movie.




Far better than the one for The World Warrior, but still not as cool as the Japanese ads. Here Capcom acknowledges Mortal Kombat as a threat and had Blanka literally destroy it, making an old security guy soil himself in the process. What does the ad teach us? Don’t piss Blanka off.

Movie Review: War

Starring:
Jet Li, Jason Statham, John Lone, Ryo Ishibashi, Devon Aoki, Luis Guzmán, Sung Kang

Director:
Philip G. Atwell

MPAA Rating:
R for sequences of strong bloody violence, sexuality/nudity and language.

Release Date:
August 2007

Synopsis:
FBI agent Jack Crawford is out for revenge when his partner is killed and all clues point to the mysterious assassin Rogue. But when Rogue turns up years later to take care of some unfinished business, he triggers a violent clash of rival gangs.

My Two Cents:
Jason Statham, the star of The Transporter and Crank faces off against Jet Li, star of Unleashed and Hero. Doesn’t that sound awesome? They already faced each other in The One, but that was six years ago when I didn’t even know who Statham was. There’s no way this movie could suck, right?

Jack Crawford (Statham) has lived in misery since his FBI partner and best friend Tom was brutally murdered along with his wife and daughter. Hi has been obsessed in finding Tom’s killer, a man only known as Rogue (Jet Li). This Rogue fellow is probably the best hitman in the world, admired by crime bosses and feared by everyone else. On the other hand, Jack is one of the baddest FBI agents in town, beating the shit out of suspects and killing goons left and right without any remorse. That’s just great, because you just know his fight with Rogue is going to be awesome.

For the first our or so the movie moves along pretty smoothly, setting up the characters and Crawford’s immense hate for Rogue. You get quite a few shootouts, some naked whores in a strip joint and a mandatory car chase. Rogue manages to play a double agent role working for both the Triads and the Yakuza, making their hatred grow and getting a lot of people killed in the process. This is all fine, but when do we get to see Li and Statham fight? They’re just talking, shooting and running. What the fuck? Jet Li doesn’t even throw a single kick until the final minutes, and even then the fight choreography sucks. Why have a martial arts expert like Li in a movie and not use his abilities? Anyone can shoot a fake gun, but not everyone can fight as cool as him.



OK, so it sucks that Jet Li is not using martial arts to kill off his opponents, but the movie is still pretty decent. That is until a sad and shitty plot twist near the end is revealed. This revelation sucks so bad, it literally kills the whole movie. And even worst, the actual ending is perhaps the worst ending I’ve ever seen. I honestly can’t remember a worst movie ending right now. The last 10 to 15 minutes destroy an otherwise enjoyable action flick. What a shame.

As a video game fan I feel the responsibility of reviewing a little fighting game included in the Blu-ray version of War. Maybe it’s also on the standard definition DVD, but I watched the Blu-ray version. Anyway, you fight one on one against an Asian dude in a suit. You play as a very muscular guy that doesn’t resemble either Statham or Li in the slightest. Maybe it’s supposed to be a gang battle against the Yakuzas and the Triads. Who knows? You are given a few choices that must be selected before the battle takes place. Yeah, you have to predict if you’ll need to punch high or low, kick high or low, or block high or low. It’s completely random so there is absolutely no strategy involved, only luck. Once your commands are selected the little guys fight. Whoever ends up with a bigger life bar wins. This is hands down the shittiest bonus feature I’ve ever seen in a movie. What a total waste of disc space. Note: the maximum suckage of this mini game does not bring the movie’s score down at all, and it certainly doesn’t add to it either.

Score:

Babes of Gaming: Lulu

Final Fantasy has had black mages since the very first game released in 1987, but Lulu is the first one to drop the traditional black mage costume in favor of one more suited to her world’s fashion. She’s the sexiest character in Final Fantasy X, in my opinion, and definitely the most well endowed. Her boobs can barely fit in her dress. And they jiggle when she walks and attacks, so those babies are real.

Lulu is one of Lady Yuna’s guardians, watching over her while she completes her pilgrimage. She has been a guardian to other summoners before, so her guidance and knowledge is highly valuable for the whole party.

Lulu’s weapons are little dolls of classic Final Fantasy mascots like moogles and cactuars. They do very little damage, but her black magic spells can be devastating. Her overdrive super move is called Fury and can inflict massive damage to a single enemy or moderate damage to every enemy on-screen.

It’s hard to believe Lulu is only 22 years old. She acts like Yuna’s older sister, but she’s so cold and serious, like she had a magic staff up her ass. She was romantically involved with Wakka’s younger brother, Chappu, but after he was killed by Sin she slowly started falling for Wakka. They don’t seem to be compatible, but her other choices were a dead guy and a hairy beast. Six months after the events of Final Fantasy X they got married and about two years later she gave birth to their son, Vidina, during the events of Final Fantasy X-2.

Owned!

Kratos puts a big smile on this medusa’s face. Maybe a bit too big for her taste.

Movie Review: The Invisible

Starring:
Justin Chatwin, Margarita Levieva, Marcia Gay Harden, Chris Marquette, Alex O’Loughlin, Callum Keith Rennie

Director:
David S. Goyer (Blade: Trinity)

MPAA Rating:
PG-13 for violence, criminality, sensuality and language.

Release Date:
April 2007

Synopsis:
When high school student Nick Powell is brutally attacked and left for dead, he regains consciousness only to discover that he's invisible to everyone. This mystery explores the elusive place between the world of the living and the land of the dead.

My Two Cents:
If you saw the trailer you pretty much know everything that’s going to happen, so it kind of sucks that it takes so damn long for Nick (Justin Chatwin) to die. You’re introduced to his mother, his High School buddies, and the overall suckage that is being a teenager for what seems like an eternity. As soon as he gets the shit beat out of him and is left for dead it becomes interesting and doesn’t let go till it’s over.

I was under the impression that once Nick was killed he had to solve his murder, by finding clues and finding a way to communicate with the living, but nope, this doesn’t happen. That’s because he realizes he’s dead very early on, and he knows exactly who killed him and how. The real problem is making people know he’s not really dead, but dying, so they better find his body and take him to a hospital before he really dies.



As if being brutally beaten and almost killed wasn’t enough, the only person who can hear him is the woman who did this to him. She’s a very troubled teen criminal that doesn’t give a shit about anyone, except her little brother. Her caring for him is the only sign that she’s human and has at least a little heart. In the later half of the movie Nick sort of end up liking her, but it’s just wrong and depressing to know she’s such a piece of trash and is the only one who can save him.

Maybe it’s a bit predictable, but Justin’s acting was pretty good. He carries almost the whole movie by himself, as you care very little about anyone else. It’s interesting to think people who have near-death experiences can exit their bodies and walk around, and then remember everything when they return to their bodies. It was fun watching Nick spy on his mom, his friends, and his attackers. You are left with a bit of a bad taste in your mouth when the movie ends, but it really couldn’t have ended any other way.

Score:

Cool Collectibles: Samus' Gunship from Metroid Prime 2

Metroid games are cool and First4Figures is making an awesome model of Samus Aran's gunship from Metroid Prime 2: Echoes. Just look at it! It stands 11.5 inches tall and comes with a neat stand that lights up along with the ship's windscreen and thrusters. Only 750 pieces will be made and they will sell for a whopping $299.99. Better start hunting for bounties if you want to get your hands on one.

Vanity Fair Indiana Jones 4 Photos

Vanity Fair magazine made an Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull cover feature with interviews and exclusive pictures. Here are three of them for your enjoyment. Follow this link for their full 5 page article.

Movie Review: The Heartbreak Kid

Starring:
Ben Stiller, Malin Akerman, Michelle Monaghan, Jerry Stiller, Carlos Mencia, Rob Corddry

Director:
Bobby and Peter Farrelly (Stuck on You, Fever Pitch)

MPAA Rating:
R for strong sexual content, crude humor and language.

Release Date:
October 2007

Synopsis:
Eddie Cantrow marries a dreamy woman only to learn at the honeymoon that she's a total nightmare. As this discovery sets in, Eddie meets the real girl of his dreams.

My Two Cents:
The Farrelly brothers have directed some of the funniest movies I’ve seen, including There’s Something About Mary, Me, Myself and Irene, and Shallow Hal, but they seem to be losing their touch. As funny as Ben Stiller is, I couldn’t help but feel heartbroken by the mostly unfunny The Heartbreak Kid.

Every character Stiller plays seems to get themselves in the most awkward situations, and Eddie Cantrow doesn’t break the tradition. He is afraid of commitment, and has blown off women that seemed perfect to everyone else. When he meets a hot blonde (Malin Akerman) and finally decides to marry her, she turns out to be a huge freak.

Most of the movie takes place in Cabo, Mexico, during their honeymoon. Even before arriving at Cabo, Lila starts acting all weird and annoying. It gets worst every day and it’s clear that Eddie is getting fed up and realizes he’s made a huge mistake by getting married way too soon. After settling in the beautiful beachside resort, Eddie meets a cute brunette called Miranda and they quickly become good friends. Slowly, but surely they start falling for each other. So Eddie now has to make a choice: put up with his wife’s insanity or dump her in favor of the more normal Miranda. He starts making up stories to hide Miranda from Lila and vice versa, but the lies get out of hand resulting in somewhat amusing situations.



Rob Corddry plays Eddie’s best friend Mac, a guy apparently completely happy with his overly-dominating wife. He’s the one who convinced Eddie to get married and go to Cabo for his honeymoon. A very funny guy. In Cabo, Eddie meets Uncle Tito (Carlos Mencia), a hotel employee that is friends with Mac, who will give the newlyweds special treatment. Uncle Tito is by far the funniest character in the movie. Ben Stiller’s real life father, Jerry, plays his father in the movie. He’s always talking about getting pussy and double-teaming broads with his son. He’s funny, but the excessive sexual comments seem forced and unnatural.

The Heartbreak Kid is occasionally funny and entertaining, but ultimately uninspired and just average. My expectations were high, having seem how funny the Farrelly brothers and Ben Stiller can be, but it seems like There’s Something About Mary won’t be topped any time soon. It’s time to stop remaking old movies and start writing original material.

Score:

Weekend Box Office Report: Dic 28 - Jan 1

The last weekend of the year ended with Nicolas Cage’s National Treasure sequel on top for the second time. Alvin and the Chipmunks and I Am Legend are still standing strong at 2nd and 3rd place. The sequel to Alien vs. Predator sort of tanked, opening at #6, but I doubt it had a huge budget, so it might still be a hit.

1. National Treasure: Book of Secrets
This week: $55,419,000
Total: $143,821,000

2. Alvin and the Chipmunks
This week: $42,200,000
Total: $154,575,000

3. I Am Legend
This week: $38,015,000

Total: $205,090,000

4. Charlie Wilson’s War
This week: $20,512,000 - Total: $43,251,000

5. Juno
This week: $15,700,000 - Total: $31,081,000

6. Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem
This week: $13,825,000 - Total: $30,655,000

7. The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep
This week: ? - Total: ?

8. P.S. I Love You
This week: $13,055,000 - Total: $27,353,000

9. Sweeny Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
This week: $11,782,000 - Total: $30,501,000

10. Enchanted
This week: $9,689,000 - Total: $113,837,000